The Missing Chicken
By Chip Tsao | published Nov 04, 2010
A mysterious fetus-carrier in America recruited by the crown prince of one of the wealthiest property tycoons in town has given birth to triplets. Pictures of the three little angels with their grinning father and happy granddad have occupied front pages of most of the local Chinese newspapers in an imperial public euphoria unseen since Nigeria’s national newspapers celebrated the birth of Prince William in 1983.
The difference is the absence of our Princess Diana, or mother Cinderella, whom the father preferred the public not to know about and soon forget. This raised the eyebrows of some ethicists, who question the motherless triplets’ parenting, and whether only the upper class of wealth can enjoy the privilege of selecting offspring of a more superior genetic quality.
From an ethnographical point of view, it is only common sense that Hong Kong’s rich have a better chance of producing superior offspring. They can afford to send their children to Eton or Winchester to receive a more civilized education. These kids come back to Lan Kwai Fong for a cheerful drink in the summer and order their babycham or gin-tonic in English tinged with a mock-aristocratic accent. Their children are unlikely to be addicted to spitting openly and squatting on Canton Road while waiting for their tourist coaches after a loot of LV and Prada shops. Each is looked after by at least three Filipino maids and escorted by two Gurkha guards to their kindergartens, and probably stay in a castle, playing hide-and-seek with their butlers in England, on boarding school term breaks.
A combination of that majestic breed of sperm paired with an egg carefully screened under the advice of the most expensive gynecological experts at the best facilities in the US may help, in the long run, boost the global image of the Chinese people. The rest of the world is getting fed up anyway with the typical stereotypes ranging from the noisy gambling crowds in Chinatown to the juggling Jackie Chan, consolidated unfortunately by Beijing’s persistent refusal to allow the value of the Renminbi to rise. It is time that an “Aryan” breed of Chinese emerged on this planet, with the help of a bit of money.
Well-known for their feminine beauty and seductive charm, the only group to stand disadvantaged is our young fellow countrywomen. Had this medical innovation come about 150 years earlier, China would have had no Empress Dowager. Our empire would have been saved, as well as our family-controlled entrepreneurial legacies, many worth tens of billions of dollars, all preserved without the fear of being equally shared with the soon-to-be-divorced wife, who could hold the children as some kind of hostages thanks to some malicious clauses in common law.
If the omelet is tasty enough, you may want to meet the chef, not the chicken. In our case, just announce the name of the clinic in the United States.
A mysterious fetus-carrier in America recruited by the crown prince of one of the wealthiest property tycoons in town has given birth to triplets. Pictures of the three little angels with their grinning father and happy granddad have occupied front pages of most of the local Chinese newspapers in an imperial public euphoria unseen since Nigeria’s national newspapers celebrated the birth of Prince William in 1983.
The difference is the absence of our Princess Diana, or mother Cinderella, whom the father preferred the public not to know about and soon forget. This raised the eyebrows of some ethicists, who question the motherless triplets’ parenting, and whether only the upper class of wealth can enjoy the privilege of selecting offspring of a more superior genetic quality.
From an ethnographical point of view, it is only common sense that Hong Kong’s rich have a better chance of producing superior offspring. They can afford to send their children to Eton or Winchester to receive a more civilized education. These kids come back to Lan Kwai Fong for a cheerful drink in the summer and order their babycham or gin-tonic in English tinged with a mock-aristocratic accent. Their children are unlikely to be addicted to spitting openly and squatting on Canton Road while waiting for their tourist coaches after a loot of LV and Prada shops. Each is looked after by at least three Filipino maids and escorted by two Gurkha guards to their kindergartens, and probably stay in a castle, playing hide-and-seek with their butlers in England, on boarding school term breaks.
A combination of that majestic breed of sperm paired with an egg carefully screened under the advice of the most expensive gynecological experts at the best facilities in the US may help, in the long run, boost the global image of the Chinese people. The rest of the world is getting fed up anyway with the typical stereotypes ranging from the noisy gambling crowds in Chinatown to the juggling Jackie Chan, consolidated unfortunately by Beijing’s persistent refusal to allow the value of the Renminbi to rise. It is time that an “Aryan” breed of Chinese emerged on this planet, with the help of a bit of money.
Well-known for their feminine beauty and seductive charm, the only group to stand disadvantaged is our young fellow countrywomen. Had this medical innovation come about 150 years earlier, China would have had no Empress Dowager. Our empire would have been saved, as well as our family-controlled entrepreneurial legacies, many worth tens of billions of dollars, all preserved without the fear of being equally shared with the soon-to-be-divorced wife, who could hold the children as some kind of hostages thanks to some malicious clauses in common law.
If the omelet is tasty enough, you may want to meet the chef, not the chicken. In our case, just announce the name of the clinic in the United States.
Labels: Politically Incorrect, 陶傑
posted by Gemini Saga at 12:00 AM
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